Just Be

I almost don’t know what to do with myself.  In the weeks leading up to moving to France, I quit both my jobs and although one was 16 hours and the other 14-16, my weeks were full, my days long and I was constantly on the go, seeing people, baking for church, working, or barely managing to keep up with household chores (which is more a matter of dislike than time)!!!  Now, we’re living in a 700 square foot apartment, which means minimal clean up, I’m not working, I don’t know anyone, I have no commitments (save feeding my husband ;)), and my responsibilities include learning French and, well that’s it really!!!

Granted I am only a few days into this chapter of life, and next week I both start daily 4 hour French classes and we have guests, so I am sure next week will be a different story.  I have pages of places to explore, and lists of attractions I want to do but right now I feel in a trance, a time warp so to speak.  Living in this time continuum, life is going on as normal back in California, and we (with some effort) pulled out of the tapestry of California and are weaving a new story.

It’s a great personal experiment of learning to just BE.  To be with myself, to be with God, to be with G (who will no doubt wish very soon that I’ll be elsewhere).  He has to work, and will do so mainly from home, so the idea is for me to make myself scarce during the day as much as possible.  Although, the plan is also for him to work in one of the two bedrooms in the apartment as to let me have the freedom to roam in the front space.  All elements that are being ironed out, and will change day to day, and week to week depending on weather, activities, work load (for him), visitors (we have guests next week like I mentioned, then G’s dad for a day, my aunt and uncle for a weekend, my nan, more friends mid May, and another set of friends at the end of May.  Plus, we are hoping to make it to Strasbourg at least once a month, as well as a few weekend visits of our own).  

Oh wait, what was I saying...oh yeah, just being, no commitments....:)

Yesterday was an excellent example of “just being” though.  Besides my plan to make it to the school to collect my materials, I could just “be” with me.  The whole being on my own, for that whole time with minimal interaction did get a little weird.  Even I can only take so much of myself ;)  Towards the end of my loooong walk, I realized I was talking to myself and not just in my head, but out loud.  I would be standing at the crossing, waiting for the magical green man (because I can assure, unless you are absolutely certain there aren’t any cars, you do NOT want to go without the green man’s go ahead and even then, it is a little dodgy) and I could hear someone speaking, saying something like “Wait for it, wait for it, GO!!”  I quickly realized that this person was ME!!  So I think things could get very interesting!!!

Á bientôt mes amis!!